CONFESSION

After 30+ years as a Christian, I still feel such powerful attractions for men.  I don't act out, but the internal battle with lust is intense sometimes.  This is quite a struggle and makes me "feel" that God must get disgusted with me...I should be "over this" by now.  I have a wonderful wife and six kids.  God has been good to me.  My flesh however loves this sin.  It is so fruitless and self-defeating.  My heart is grieved.  I go through seasons of greater liberty, then slip back.  I love/hate it.  It is such a nasty idol in my life.  Forgive the flavor of self-pity in this.
I know we have to be ruthless against temptations.  Please stand with me as I confess this.

GOD’S WORD SAYS

Eph 6:10   Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Eph 6:11   Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. Eph 6:12   For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual {forces} of wickedness in the heavenly {places.} Eph 6:13   Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. Eph 6:14   Stand firm therefore, HAVING GIRDED YOUR LOINS WITH TRUTH, and HAVING PUT ON THE BREASTPLATE OF RIGHTEOUSNESS, Eph 6:15   and having shod YOUR FEET WITH THE PREPARATION OF THE GOSPEL OF PEACE; Eph 6:16   in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil {one.} Eph 6:17   And take THE HELMET OF SALVATION, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

Dennis Says

Brother, see yourself as a new creation. You are no longer defined by your past – even your past of one minute ago. Put off the lies and put on the truth of who you are. Forgive yourself as you receive God’s forgiveness. Change your thoughts and you change your attitudes. Change your attitudes and you change your behavior. Change your behavior and you change even your feelings. Stand firm in the identity God has given you. Everything that is the mighty oak tree is found in the acorn. The acorn simply needs to grow into what it already is. Everything you are as a mighty man of God is in the core of your identity as a new creation. You simply need to grow into who you already are. I will be sending you an aid in your battle, brother.